Possibly because it’s the darkest time in the Northern Hemisphere, and maybe just because we’re rapidly reaching the end of yet another year, I am refelecting on those profound life events that in hindsight are our “before & after” splits in time. We don’t have just one of these moments; over the course of a lifetime we each have multiple beginnings and endings—some more painful than others. And that’s not to say that all before and after events are painful. A happy union, the birth of a child, a windfall, a new job, graduation are examples of before and after moments that define our lives and alter our trajectory, and which provide feelings of accomplishment and personal growth. You might hear yourself or others speak of “before” as the past is recounted and a milestone shift happened. ‘Before I was married,” or “Before I was divorced” are each before and after events that typically have very differing energies attached. Each is a stand alone moment that splits the past from the present.

Life is all about changes. It’s about not hanging on too long to what’s gone before us and it’s about not living too entrenched in the ideals of a future that hasn’t happened yet. Before and after are ways, I suppose, of catagorizing our lives into manageable segments that help to explain how we got from A to Z, how to explain the scars and wounds and quirks that define us in the present. And of course, it goes without saying, that some of these “before” wounds leave scorching psychological scars. Some before & after events never heal. Some have deeper impact on our “after” especially when the change agent comes unexpectedly. Death brings the “after” more frequently now, as I outlive many of my cherished friends and family members. And some deaths create a more substantial divide between then and now, before and after. All of these milestones bring growth. Kicking and screaming in some cases, perhaps, but personal growth nonetheless.

My point in all this wordiness is just to say that as the year comes to a close and yet another before and after splits the calendar into last year and next, I encourage you to take a moment to reflect on your own before and after experiences. We cannot progress until we have put to bed the niggles of our “befores,” and I am left wondering what this next “after” is bringing. Wishing you a safe, love-filled, holiday season, and a magnificent new year. May we each be blessed with peace and prosperity.